Group Coaching Magic: Building Self-Love and Vibrancy Together

In this episode, we celebrate 175 episodes of the Live A Vibrant Life Podcast! 

This milestone wouldn’t be possible without this supportive community. Thank you for listening and sharing!

Today's podcast is a conversation with several of my long term clients.

We discuss the value of group coaching, cultivating self-awareness, extending kindness to ourselves and others, and aligning our energy towards purposeful work.

Group coaching helps us know we are not alone in our journeys and can learn so much from each other.  

• Here are 3 key takeaways: 
• Self-awareness transforms how you lead and live: Learning to embrace your unique wiring—like the genius of "wonder”—can shift self-criticism to self-acceptance and growth.
• Community accelerates your progress: Witnessing and participating in group coaching unlocks new insights and reminds you that you’re not alone in your challenges or aspirations.
• Small steps and routine check-ins matter: Aligning your time and energy to what truly matters enables real, sustainable progress on purpose-filled goals—even just 30 minutes a week can make a lasting difference.

Want to join us?

Links 

• Join Kelly's Group Coaching Program
• Join Kelly’s Free community on Skool

 Let's connect.

I am cheering for you!

Transcript

0:00

As I learned boundaries and emotionally healthy spirituality, I started to rest. I became an example of what it looked like to not overgive, to take care of myself first and then have the energy to go out and give and take care of others. Welcome to the Live A Vibrant Life podcast. I'm life coach Kelly Kibbitz, and each week I'll be here to encourage and equip you with the tools you need to grow in self-awareness and invest your best energy in your dreams and your purpose. I believe self-awareness changes everything. Let's get started. Welcome to the Live A Vibrant Life podcast. Today I am celebrating 175 podcast episodes. I love the fact that over the last year, several people have reached out to me and talked about how the podcast has been helpful. And so today I wanted to invite some of my friends who are in my coaching community to come and talk about how the coaching tools that I've created. Thank you for being here today. Thank you for being part of my community. My first question is, has coaching helped you become more kind and loving to yourself and other people? My coaching system was based on the idea that Jesus came and he said, I've come to give you an abundant life. When my girls were little, I had a family Bible verse, and it was from the book of Ephesians and it said, be kind and loving to one another, forgiving one another as Christ has forgiven you. And I loved to say that to my girls. Be kind and loving to one another. And then one day I remember thinking, I think this verse is for me first. To be kind and loving first to myself and then to others. To forgive others 'cause Christ has forgiven me. I was wondering if any of you noticed learning these tools has it made it easier to be kind and loving to yourself and others? I've had like big ahas in your group with your coaching. One of the first ones I think was the working genius. Being the wonderer and asking questions. It's one of the things that's actually driven me crazy about myself. I feel like I can ask all the questions. You pointed out that's actually a gift And that's a good thing. That definitely made me feel like more confident with myself. Oh, okay. Other people need that. And how the different personality types work together. Each team needs all different types of personality types. That's one example. Working with you I feel like you know me better than I know myself. In a lot of ways, which I appreciate. You have great insights and observations. So. I love that so much. The wonder part of the working genius, I have not met somebody yet who said, I know this about myself. I think sometimes people are afraid to grow in self-awareness. What if we can do it without any shame? Like how human of me, nobody is perfect. Nobody has all six working geniuses. But I do have this one. I have wonder. So thank you for saying that. because I I think a lot of women with wonder don't even know. It's a genius. And we all need wonder before we begin doing work. Why are we doing it? And what are we doing? Thank you Anyone else notice anything about being more kind and loving to themselves? Ellen, what did you notice? Congratulations on 175 podcasts. That's fantastic. To, um, dovetail off of what Kelly said, the change from being critical of myself and scared to look in the mirror and do that deep work is huge because you've done it in a way that's so kind. It changes this self condemnation or list of character flaws to, well this is how I'm wired. You were built to do this and made to be this way and they're not flaws. Some of them are gifts. I'm wonder as well in the working genius. It has been frustrating 'cause it isn't something that's really honored. And that explains so much. It felt really freeing to feel like, oh this is actually a genius. The Enneagram was one of the earliest things. I've been working with you for years now and was really helpful in me starting to be kinder to myself and to other people. And to accept that we all think so differently sounds so simple to say, we're all different, so they just think differently. But we really do walk through life wanting everyone to be like us so it's easier and that's just not reality. The nuance of it and all the complex layers of it for me has been very worth the time it's taken. It's led me to, I believe, to be a better version of myself, which is kind of the whole point of, of doing the work and being coached. And like Kelly said as well, you have the ability to know things about ourselves that we don't know because you're seeing it from the outside. Which is really helpful and makes it so much less judgmental. If we can be curious without judgment, then we can be open and receptive to that. Judy, did you notice anything? Oh, I would just ditto what Ellen said because I'm also an Enneagram one and Wonder is one of my geniuses. But, it's so hard for me to examine myself. I I can judge everybody else and do a pretty good job of it. But one of the, the first things that, that you pointed out to me is just that not everybody sees the mistakes. That I see. And so for me to know, a, that they're oblivious to their mistakes, but also they're oblivious to my mistakes. Yeah. And they don't judge as harshly as I do. It's really freed me, um, number one, not to be so judgmental, but also to realize that not everybody is sitting there with a with a checklist, um, looking at my life and noticing where I'm falling short. And that truly the only, the only one who is my judge is God and he loves me so much that, that it covers a multitude of sense. Ah, I love that so much because that really is my heart that we would all remember how deeply loved we are. And Stacey, I love that that brings us to you because that's one of my favorite things about you is you do know how deeply loved you are. You had parents who just did a great job of that. Anything else you noticed, Stacy, about being kind of loving to others through coaching Definitely. And everything everybody else has said for sure. And the concept of when I'm in, in health, knowing that I'm satisfied and when I'm not in health, knowing that I'm frustrated. And how. How that's helped me. I appreciate the repetition. I feel like this is important to continue on a path. I appreciate the affordability so that I can continue on it. I can become aware quickly about what energy I'm in and how to get to that alignment, that baseline, in order to move forward. Also in thinking about, I was never afraid to bring helpers in to help me with different pieces, but understanding that things that really deplete me, totally energize someone else. And in working with you and even others in this group are like, well that was fun. That was my pleasure to participate in and what a difference that can make that. Sometimes I I used to get caught up. Who would possibly want to? Help with the thing that really depletes me. The fact is I'm so grateful to have people in my life that are able to come alongside me and me to feel unstuck after a short time with them and joyful when it's over. And be able to focus on what's important to me and also help me too not focus on the things that I'm getting caught up on even though I thought I wanted to concentrate on them. I think paying attention to our own life wasn't something that we were maybe brought up to do. As women, especially for me, it was put others first and don't even notice if you're mentally, emotionally, physically tired. It's your job to over give. What that created was a very resentful, overwhelmed, frustrated mom My girls would say when they were little. What does your mom say all the time? I'm so tired. Well, I could have rested. As I learned boundaries and emotionally healthy spirituality, I started to rest. I became an example for them of what it looked like to not overgive. But to take care of myself first and then have the energy to go out and give and take care of others. My program was based on the idea that Jesus said, I came that you might have an abundant life. I use the word vibrant. I think life has ups and downs. Sometimes coaching is seen as once you know these things, you're going to live this perfect life. You're not going to make mistakes. You're not going to be judgemental. You're just going to do everything right. And then when you don't, you can kind of judge yourself. I've done three years of coaching and five years of therapy, and I'm still making these mistakes. A vibrant life is acknowledging life has highs and lows. What a community can do is support each other. I wonder if anyone ever noticed you came to group coaching one day and somebody said something and it made you feel not alone. You thought, oh, me too. Some of you have already said that. You're like, oh, I'm also a Wonderer, or as an Enneagram one, I also feel this way. But I was wondering if anyone noticed having a group of people to do this with made it easier. You started to realize you weren't alone. There were other people just like you who were trying to do purpose-filled work and then living a life where there's relationships and there's your house to take care of, and living a life. And having people around you- you found support in that. You found it to be something that gave you the encouragement to go on. I know some of you, on Wednesdays, you guard that time. You say, i'm going to go here and I'm going to get that 30 minutes together and it's going to give me some energy. Did anyone ever notice that? One of the things I noticed is that often watching the interaction of a conversation between you and another member of the group, that even if that specific discussion isn't the avenue I'm walking down- to watch that interaction, like I think Ellen described about you on the outside looking in and then helping us see certain questions we might not be asking ourselves that I notice as you're asking other members of our group community, that often helps me think similarly about those questions. Whatever it is that I'm challenged with Watching the process when this time is dedicated to you, helping give the person the time, the space, the safety of coming up with the answer or the feeling or the action is really helpful to, to watch. And then potentially come up with solutions for my own things. That was why I wanted group coaching. I had been part of a coaching community. When it was the coach talking to me, I'd have to go back and re-watch it to really hear what the coach was saying. But when I was sitting to the side and they were coaching somebody else, it was so clear to me, oh, they're thinking this thought, and that's making them feel this feeling. And if they could find a thought, that's true that didn't create that feeling, a different result would happen. That is part of why I really wanted to have a group coaching program. I think it does serve us to sometimes get outside of our own brain. I think the group coaching has a little magic to it. Watching or witnessing you coach someone else in the moment. But also that community sense when I'm talking and I see you guys nod, it's so affirming, right? The ups and downs and the safety of being able to talk when there's a down moment or low energy or something that's confusing. It's this sense of community in that we're all walking this journey together, even though our journeys are each so unique. Sometimes, like Stacy said, there'll be a challenge, someone will be coached by that. It won't necessarily be my challenge, but I'll benefit from watching you coach that person in that moment. It really is powerful and and there's huge value in one-on-one coaching, right? That's very different and you do both of those things, which I think is critical. Some people want one or the other and many people want both. But, there is something special about group coaching. I say that from someone who's not very social, who is not really drawn to that kind of thing, but it's very beneficial. I was just going to say that watching people go through certain steps, being held accountable in a sense, not in a rigid way of did you do those steps? I still remember when Ellen was cleaning out her closet, how she broke it down into very small steps. And I'm just watching her do that and learning alongside her. Of how small those steps can be, to achieve a bigger goal. And how she was able to do that in real time, so to speak. Watching her- knowing that I could do that. Her tips of making my closet my friend, I still use that to this day. I think that's one of the benefits of having a group I don't know all the answers, but having different people share their perspective and sometimes someone else's thought helps you create a new thought. That new thought creates a new feeling and a new direction. The final reason I wanted us to be together for this celebration of 175 podcasts is when I began my podcast. I didn't think I could do any of this. I had hired a podcast producer. And I did one podcast a month. And after a while, I felt confident enough to take a class and create my own podcast and do the editing. And since then, the amount of things that I've learned to do, I'm so proud of myself. One of the most important is that I learned how to say I'm going to do something, and then set apart the time because it's important. I show up for myself and I do it. And I've created this version of myself that I really, really love. My girls are grown, they have their own lives. I'm not chasing them. I'm doing my own purpose-filled work. And I think there might be people listening to this podcast and they're their soul, they have something that's important to them. Maybe they wanna write a blog Maybe they wanna create a community of friends that come over and read books together and bring light and love into the world. Sometimes it's easy I know all of us have experienced this to put what's important to us at the bottom of the list. And then every single day, the urgency of life happens. And we just let our important thing go for this day. And we think we'll get to it tomorrow or the next week or the next year. And then we look back and five years have gone By being together. We've all taken small steps in the direction of here's something purposeful that's important to me. If somebody's listening today and they're thinking. I do have something that's important to me and it's not getting any of my time and it's not getting any of my energy. I wonder if joining Kelly's program and watching her videos would be helpful or joining the group program would be helpful. Would any of you say that giving up 30 minutes on repeat, most of you've been doing this for years with me, has helped you with your purpose, purpose-filled work. Anything important that got more time, more attention, more energy because you decided it? There's been a lot. The combination of breaking something down into a small enough step that you'll actually be motivated to do it if it's a big project. Time blocks and energy. Energy came up real early in, your coaching content and understanding the different types of energy and how it fluctuates throughout the day. It fluctuates by season. And aligning my schedule has been a really impactful change. I don't try to schedule things when I know I don't have the mental energy for it or the physical energy for it. It's guided my time management. It seems so small, but it really isn't. And I need the reminders over and over again. I mean, even just today we were talking earlier about when spring, when it's really, the days are really long and the light is later, my afternoon time block really is more like three separate blocks. I didn't make the shift this year here. I've been doing this work for you for years and, and I didn't make that shift this year and adjust my blocks accordingly 'cause I do have more time. It feels like it, it's just psychological 'cause of light, but it makes a big difference. And that little nuance is really big for me. I need the reminder weekly. I think that weekly is so worth the time because how many times do you make a change and then, you know, it kind of fades away because you just started to forget about it. Not just forget about it. Life is busy. We all have Yeah. People we love The urgency of life can get in the way of what's important. How are you doing and what do you need and having people around you to support you. 30 minutes once a week is so important. Anyone else? Three years ago, we moved states and I left behind a whole bunch of leadership roles and connections and organizations and whole life that I had built over the years. Coming to Minnesota and having you encourage me to share my wisdom with younger leaders and other leaders just in general, has resulted in a blog that has lasted two and a half years, far longer than I would've on my own. I never would've had the persistence and the energy. To notice that energy, like Ellen said, um, of setting aside blocks of time to write and to just practice writing. Even if it doesn't result in something that I publish online. So thank you very much for that and for many years of great coaching. Well, thank you for that. And it's a good reminder that I think every single person was made on purpose for a purpose. But the reality of the urgency of life, it sometimes gets in the way. And so having just 30 minutes set aside, you're like, oh, yes. I don't wanna forget again. I'll find a way to it. And then to be kind and loving. Life happens. Sometimes we get sick. I wanna thank all of you. You've all been encouragement to me of there have been times where I wanna give up. I remember one day in particular and Ellen's like, just go get some water and sit in the sun and see if you feel better tomorrow. And I did. Stacy, anything you noticed? I for sure can remember. I had no idea the difference it would make. I just knew I needed something different. And I would encourage anyone considering it to just try it. Because you're so gracious and generous about saying, I'm not trying to lure you in. I'm trying to help your life be the most vibrant life that you can have. Just give it a try. And you are so, so gracious and nonjudgmental. And are never offended if somebody decides it's not for them. So why not try it? What if it is for you? And you'd be so glad. It could make the difference in your life like it has in ours. Well, that is a great way to end. Thank you all for being here today. I so appreciate you! Thank you for listening. I hope our time together helps you live a brave, creative, purpose-filled life. thank you for joining the Live A Vibrant Life podcast. I hope our time together encourage you and will equip you with the tools you need to move into the vibrant life you desire. I'm here to help you live a brave, creative, purpose-filled life. And if you'd like to learn more. You can follow me on Instagram or Facebook, Kelly tibbits life coach, or visit my website kelly tibbits.com. I look forward to connecting again soon.