Book Week: Abundant Ever After

This week on the podcast, Kelly shares her thoughts about Chapter 1 of "Abundant Ever After" by Cathy Heller.

This book emphasizes self-awareness, prosperity, and ease in life.It helps us shift our  focus from material to emotional & spiritual abundance. 

Chapter 1 highlights the importance of personal choices over external expectations.  Using examples from her life, Kelly shares the ripple effect of energy, the power of thoughts, and the significance of personal values and community. 

If you are looking for a community that will encourage you to focus on your self-care, and that will help you define what  personal abundance is to you - join Kelly’s community and make 2025 the year you live A Vibrant Life!

Links 

• Join Kelly's Group Coaching Program
• Mel Robbins 
• Cathy Heller

Let's connect.

I am cheering for you!

Transcript

0:09

Welcome to the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I'm life coach Kelly Kibbitz, and each week I'll be here to encourage and equip you with the tools you need to grow in self awareness and invest your best energy in your dreams and your purpose. I believe self awareness changes everything. Let's get started. Welcome I wanted to hop on today with a book review for you. I want to share what I have been learning about In particular, about once every six weeks on the podcast I'm going to share a book or resource that has been helping me. Today I'm going to share The new book by Cathy Heller, Abundant Ever After. The subtitle is Tools for Creating a Life of Prosperity and Ease My first question to you is, what do you notice when I say you and I were created for a life of prosperity and ease? I would say before I found this work, both of those thoughts seemed not only untrue, they seemed wrong. My deep belief was I was not meant to have a prosperous, easy life. It was supposed to be hard. And if I had too much, that wasn't fair. This has taken a lot of thought work to get to a place where I think abundance is what life was meant to be. And that doesn't necessarily mean material things. In fact, often it means not a lot of material things. If you've ever gone to a hotel or stayed in an Airbnb where all your stuff wasn't in the space, did you notice that sense of freedom and abundance from just getting away from stuff? So it's not about stuff, it's not about money as much as it is about How are we currently feeling about the life we are living? Are we meant to live a life of abundance, enthusiasm, ease? Just notice that. For me, I'm growing in my belief that that's true. And I think the more I believe it's true, the more I say the right yeses and the right nos for me, instead of making my yeses and nos about other people. And again, that was how I live most of my life. What do other people want? That will be my yes and my no. And now what I'm trying to do, and it's not easy, is to say, what would I like? Would I like to go visit this person? Would I like to use my money and my time and my energy in this way? And if it's a no to be okay, Because I was created to live a life that has abundance, ease, enthusiasm. So one of Kathy Heller's favorite people to listen to is Wayne Dyer, and he says this sentence, We don't get what we want, we get what we are. If we are overwhelmed, confused, frustrated, exhausted, probably what we're drawing into our life is more and more things we should be saying no to, and instead we're saying yes, and we're getting more and more overwhelmed, frustration, and Unhappiness because in general what I have found to be true from the people that I'm learning from and again I'm just sharing with you what I'm learning and you take the fish and leave the bones, um, humans leave a ripple effect with their energy. So imagine standing next to a lake and throwing a rock and seeing the ripple effect. If I go into this world frustrated, overwhelmed, exhausted, and I show up in an event frustrated, overwhelmed, exhausted, what I'm putting out into the world is frustration and overwhelm and exhaustion. And I'm doing it from, um, a desire of being a good person. I'm saying a yes when I should say no because I want to be kind and loving, but I'm not showing up in kindness and lovingness because I don't love myself first to say the no, I'm tired. I'm going to stay home and restore my energy. So think for a moment. How are you right now? mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. Are you someone that's putting a ripple effect of joy and love and peace and patience and kindness and goodness and gentleness and self control? Those are the fruit of the spirit. And those are one of the things that we naturally have when we're in Aligned Energy. It's a way to check in. If I'm in Aligned Energy, I'm going to be loving and kind and patient and full of peace. And when I've moved out of Aligned Energy, how human of me, I'm I've said too many yeses, that should have been nos. I've said too many nos, that should have been yeses. That's one of the things I really am noticing. It's so easy for me, now having done this work, to say no a little easier. It's still hard for me to say yes to what I would like. Yes, I'd like to buy that. Yes, I'd like to go there. Yes, I'd like to do this thing. And so I shared a little bit about this on Instagram. But A couple weeks before Christmas, my daughter lives in Boston and outside of her apartment was, a bunch of little tiny, cute stores called Snowport. It is the exact opposite of something my husband would like to do. I was only going to see my children for a couple of days and they all really wanted to go to a brewery and I don't love drinking alcohol. I really wanted to go to Snowport. They really wanted to go to the brewery. I'm only going to see them for a little bit of time. And I decided to say my best, yes, I'm going to go over here and do this and you go and do that. Now the old me would have gone to the brewery and been kind of pissy. And that would have been the energy I put out, like kind of judgy, not really kind and loving. Instead, I went and had a beautiful time, they had a great time, we got back together, and the energy, the ripple effect, was what I want to be putting out into the world. I was taking care of me, setting a good example for my daughters, hey, make sure you take care of yourself first before you give away to others. So that might be the first thing you want to notice. Are you aware that it's not about what you do, it's about who you are? What values do you want driving your life? Here's a question to help you there. Instead of asking yourself, what am I supposed to do? What if for the next season ahead, our question is, who am I supposed to be? I think each of us have aligned values that we may or may never have written down and acknowledged. Some of us want to be people of peace. Some people want to be people who create community. Others want to be people who are bringing light and joy into the world. Some people want to be the people who are speaking clearly and authentically and truthfully. What would you notice are two or three values that you want deriving your life? As I created my company, I was so lucky that my first life coach was actually an expert on culture. Her name is Jenny Catron. She was recently on the John Maxwell podcast and he loved her so much he had her back for a second one. I don't know if you know John Maxwell, but he is the leader of leaders. And her whole reason for being on this earth is to help people understand the importance of culture. Have you ever worked in an organization where the culture was just terrible? They may have had words on the wall, but they did not match how people treated and respected each other. So from the beginning, I wanted to be clear that what I'm putting into the world through my coaching company, I want to be collaborative. I believe that community is better. You go further if you work with other people. So I want to be collaborative. I want to learn from each other. I want to be generous with my thoughts and my actions and my money. And I want to help people create expeditious results. I want to read the Cathy Heller book and then share some insight with you so that you can learn and take away one little nugget. That's our first thought for today. Who do you want to be? Right now, is there alignment between who you want to be and how you are doing this version of life? I've not met somebody yet who said, I want to be so overwhelmed that I'm grumpy. I'm so, frustrated all the time that I can't find a kind thought or a word for somebody else. I want to be so tired that I can barely get my head off the chair. I don't know anybody who wants that. I know a lot of people who are living that way. There's a gap between who they want to be and who they are. So who do you want to be? Let's write it down and then let's believe that you are safe to be abundant. The universe is abundant. God is abundant. You are safe enough to be abundant. To say the yeses and the nos. I think when I can truly lean into my faith system and believe that God is God and I am not, I'm not responsible for other people. They get to think and feel and do anything they want. They're having their human experience. It's not my job to come in and save them. It's not my job to come in and keep the consequences of their actions from happening. Let them live their human life and me My job is to say I want to be abundant, enthusiastic, full of wisdom, and brave, and creative, and full of purpose. I want to flourish. I want to be intentional. If I know who I am desiring to be, my yeses and nos line up to that much, much easier. Our next idea, and again, I'm only sharing chapter one with you. I think this book is fantastic. It's called Abundant Ever After. Highly recommend you get it on audio because I think she's a fantastic speaker. But you could also borrow at the library and read it. The next thing that I thought was important to remember is we are made to grow, to soar, to thrive. You, as a human, were intended to grow, and soar, and thrive. And when you are not, it's because you're out of alignment. My coaching program is designed around the idea that we can align our energy. Our energy, when it's aligned, helps us grow and soar and thrive. And growing and soaring and thriving does not actually mean just staying still and doing nothing new. Actually, a lot of the growth comes from doing those hard things, trying something that we haven't done before, allowing ourselves to fail at something and keep working at it and get better. So I'm definitely not saying that.\ You're intended to have a life of just ease. That doesn't often serve people. I think about, for me, the week between Christmas and New Year's, in general, my systems and my protocol kind of falls to the wayside. I eat a little bit more junk food than I'd like to eat. I exercise a little bit less. It might feel like ease, but I don't actually feel really good usually by the time the week is over. I'm gonna work a little bit harder on that this year. The next sentence to think about is abundance isn't necessarily material things. And these were all new ideas for me. When I thought of abundance, I always thought of somebody with a big house or a fancy car who went on vacations. But, I think we've all heard stories of people who've gone to visit, people who live in an island, or people who live in a small little home with just the things they love. I think of my husband's grandmother. She lived in this small trailer, and it was like a time capsule. She had these beautiful Avon perfume containers from the 70s. She had exactly the chair that was comfortable that she loved. She had bought herself special plates, and she didn't need to replace them every year. Abundance isn't necessarily material things, but it is you connected to your most elevated state. So what would that look like for you today to believe that you were meant to live a life of abundance? Abundant thoughts, abundant feelings, abundant actions. So let's just take one moment, and you can breathe in, hold your breath for a moment, and take a big sighing breath out. Do that a couple of times and see if you notice, what would abundance look like for you in this season of your life? I think back to when my children were little. They were a brand new baby, and a one year old, and a four year old. My husband traveled all the time. It would have been unrealistic for me to say, abundance looks like lots of free time at the spa. That was not anywhere near possible for me. But abundance could look like me letting the children play and sitting in a chair for a few minutes and reading or watching something I wanted to watch or making myself a cup of tea, going for a walk, making sure that I got to the gym a few times a week because I really enjoyed getting out of my house back in those days when they were extremely little. So abundance doesn't have to be a big thing, but it should be a part of our life. So if you could decide today what you would like your abundant life to look like, is it more of something or less of something? And it's probably both. Is it more time with a certain person that helps your energy align and fills you with enthusiasm and excitement and joy? Is it less time with somebody who every time you're together, it's like your energy gets drained and you feel a little exhausted when you're together? That's okay to make that decision that you want abundant aligned energy by saying this yes and that no and nothing has to be all or nothing It could be a little bit more Yes, and a little bit less now Are there any feelings you want to feel more of? The good news is you and I were given this amazing gift. We create our feelings by our thoughts. Now, we have thousands of thoughts a day. We might not notice them Any of them. So what would it look like to say, I'm going to gift myself two to 10 minutes a day with a piece of paper and some good mental energy. And I'm just going to notice what I'm thinking. And does that thought on repeat, give me the feelings that I want? Abundant aligned feelings. I would say for many years of my life, until I found self help and self development, I had some really crappy thoughts running around in my brain. And I didn't even notice them. But I'm so thankful for the different teachers that I learned from. I think, I loved Oprah from when I was in high school, and she helped me think of some new thoughts. I remember reading a book by somebody who talked about the fact that you can create your own joy. And she talked about a monk who, on purpose, whenever he was doing the dishes, would use that time of the water flowing over his hands to remember how much God loved him. The resource of the water over his hands was a way for him to remember that God's love was overflowing. And as a young mom, I washed dishes a lot, and that was just enough of a new thought to be able to help me remember that there was this abundance of love available to me. I just wasn't noticing it, and I wasn't thinking on repeat how loved I was. So what would you like to think? Would you like to feel? If you want to feel peace, we want to find thoughts that bring peace. One of the thoughts that bring me, brings me peace is:in this breath, all is well. My brain can so easily go into the future and think of all the horrible things that could happen. As of today, every time I sit and say, in this breath, all is well, all has been well in that breath. And that brings me peace. Maybe you want to feel joy, love, find the thought that aligns that feeling and you get to create it. And then from that aligned energy, that's where we want to say our yeses and our nos. If you get to listen to Abundant Ever After, by Cathy Heller please go to my Facebook or my Instagram and tell me a little bit about what you learned from it. You can find her on Instagram as well, and I'll be back next week. Thank you for joining the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I hope our time together encouraged you and will equip you with the tools you need to move into the vibrant life you desire. I'm here to help you live a brave, creative, purpose filled life. And if you'd like to learn more, you can follow me on Instagram or Facebook, Kelly Tibbetts Life Coach, or visit my website, kellytibbetts. com. I look forward to connecting again soon.