Nine Paths to Rest

Many of us think of “rest” as maybe a nap or just a break from what we're currently doing.  However, there are many kinds of rest and it’s important to choose and practice the ones that are right for you.

I was inspired by an Instagram post from ninetypes.co on how we can rest based on our Enneagram.  In this podcast, I'm offering my thoughts on different ways of thinking about rest that roughly correspond to the nine Enneagram types.

As none of us need to stay “stuck in the box” of our main type, we are also not “stuck” with just one version of rest.  There likely are several types of rest that will work well for you in different circumstances.  It doesn’t matter if you know your Enneagram type or not. 

Take a listen and try out some new kinds of rest in your regular practice - see what a difference it can make in your life!  Nine KInds of Rest

1. Gift yourself some time away

2. Give yourself permission to not be helpful

3. Be unproductive on purpose

4. Connect to art or nature

5. Make time for solitude

6. Let someone else make decisions and take responsibility

7. Allow time for stillness

8. Create a space you enjoy

9. Take time to journal & notice what you’re thinking

Links 

• Join Kelly's Group Coaching Program
• https://www.ninetypes.co

Let's connect.

I am cheering for you!

Transcript

0:14

Welcome to the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I'm life coach Kelly Tibbitts, and each week I'll be here to encourage and equip you with the tools you need to grow in self awareness and invest your best energy in your dreams and your purpose. I believe self awareness changes everything. Let's get started. Welcome Hey friends. I'm excited to talk to you about a way that we can fill our soul with sunshine, and that is to decide that there is great value in being people who know how to rest and rest well. Now, when I say the word rest, I know many of us think maybe a nap or just a break from what we're currently doing. And I'm going to offer you nine different ways. of thinking about rest. And the reason I'm choosing nine is, as you know, I'm an Enneagram coach. I think there are nine ways of thinking, feeling, and doing life. And so each of these nine different ways of resting kind of go along with one of the Enneagram numbers. And what you might begin to notice is there's four or five of them that really speak to you. They sound like things you would like. And then there may be others that don't feel exactly what you need at this time. Nothing's gone wrong. Maybe just decide that one or two of these practices could be beneficial as you go into the next season. For many of us, getting ready to go into fall means that we look back at summer and we might have some thoughts and feelings about what we said yes and no to. The amount of energy we have going into a season that tends to be a little bit busier. And so, what I've offered throughout the summer, Series called fill your soul with sunshine is that if we could rest and then play and then work, that's the path to filling our own soul with sunshine. All three are important resting well, and that doesn't mean just physical rest playing or enjoying your own precious life and then doing the work that matters to you. And all work is work, whether it's keeping your house clean, helping your child have fun this summer, doing something for pay or bringing goodness into the world by volunteering. All work is work. Let's look today at nine different ways of resting and see what you notice as I share them. So the first one, you Enneagram Ones in the Body Center may notice that you would love some time away. I know this is true for my husband who's not an Enneagram One, but he takes on the responsibilities of a lot of things around our house and when we're home, even if he could rest, he often finds it hard to do so because there's always one more project that could use his time. Enneagram ones tend to think that they're doing things the right way for the right reason. And so there's probably a list that you're holding in your body of the knowing of all the different things that could be done. So what would it look like to decide today, I'm going to take some time and go away and it doesn't have to be far. I promise you, if you can find that sweet spot, that maybe is one walk away or one quick drive away, but just getting out of your day to day space might be really great for you to rest. I was surprised that two places I've really enjoyed being at this summer were so close. One is a lake that's not too far from my home, about 30 minutes away, and one is a beautiful ocean town in Maine that's a little more than an hour away, and I intend to come back here again because I've had so much fun here this summer. The next path for Enneagram twos in particular, those heart centered, People who are processing life through their feelings is the permission to not be helpful. What if self care is not selfish? What if the next time somebody brings an opportunity to you to serve you decide this day I'm choosing to not be helpful. Ooh, how does that feel? I know when I began doing this work that would have felt very very uncomfortable and now I'm noticing that I get to decide in advance when I want to be generous. I know this is a really interesting concept for me as well, but I don't have to be helpful every single day. I can have boundaries around my life. I can say the yeses and nos, because you know what happened when I said yes to everything? I was very resentful. I was very overwhelmed. I felt like nobody else was holding up their part of the bargain. So we're going to allow the adults in our life to have their own human experiences. When people offer us the opportunity to serve, we get to say, No, thank you. And no is actually a complete sentence. I know if you're anything like me, that doesn't feel true if you're just at the beginning of your path of work, but I promise you it's true. So what if your decision now is I'm going to rest well for the next few weeks by not being helpful, by not stepping into other things that belong to other people, we're going to let them have their own human experience. Okay, my Enneagram threes who are also in the heart center. Very aware of everyone else's feelings. Not always aware of what you're feeling. What if you decided on purpose to do something unproductive? Ooh, that would be a tough one for me as well to decide at the beginning of this path. I'll tell you it's pretty easy for me now. But when I first began learning about Sabbath and setting time away, just sitting and not having anything to show for it felt very, very uncomfortable. Now I can so easily have a list of things to do and still choose on my day of rest To do something like read or use my watercolor paint or go for a walk, but not for the value of getting my walk in just to enjoy it. One of the things I do when I go for walks is I try to take my camera and look for things that I think are pretty. Often it's, you know, flowers, but it could be trees. It could be the clouds. What's something you could do that's completely unproductive and restful? Our Enneagram 4s are also in the heart center, very, very aware of their feelings. Um, what would it look like to gift yourself some time to connect to art or nature? The gift of an Enneagram 4 is you're so good at noticing and allowing all of the beautiful feelings. It's what makes Enneagram 4s such amazing artists, they're musicians, they're poets, they're authors. What if you decide today, sometime in your schedule over the next few months, there's going to be time to be immersed in the art that you enjoy or being out in nature. Enneagram fives. It's so important for you to know as thinking centered that, um, are very aware of the limits of your energy. You need solitude. To recharge. Is that showing up anywhere in your life? Most Enneagram fives I know are very good at guarding their boundaries. It's how they've gotten through and been successful, but all of us could really benefit from all of these different paths of rest. So what does that feel like for you today? Some solitude, some time to recharge. Next we have the Enneagram sixes, which are also in the thinking center, more compliant energy. What if you chose today that for the whole day, you're going to take a break from restability? Because I know it's very hard for those anywhere and I see it all the time. Your brain is so good at showing you all the possible things that could go wrong. You can't help but feel responsible for doing the right things and making sure that everything is safe. But what if for today you let somebody else be responsible? I know it can feel really, really hard and overwhelming, but the good news about learning some of these coaching tools and then applying them. is, the first time is very uncomfortable, the second time it's a little bit easier, and often the third time to the hundredth time is the charm. It's the repeating over and over again. Maybe on Thursdays, you're not the one that's responsible. It's a decision you make, you let the people around you know, I'm not making any decisions for this whole day, every Thursday. And see if you can grow in your ability to let other people Turns being responsible. And again, as I'm offering you these paths, the goal is what it's for us to rest emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, Enneagram sevens. I have an Enneagram seven daughter and this word is not fun stillness, but it's so good for all of us. Sometimes it could be in Savasana in yoga. It could be a day where you just don't have any activities. I know when I was younger, mom, I had seen an episode of Oprah, where she suggested once a week, you don't spend any money and you don't go anywhere. I don't think I was ever able to fully honor that, but it does sound really beautiful. Doesn't it? Once a week, what would it look like to be still? And whatever that might look like to you. Number eight is for our Enneagram eights. You're in the body center. You know what you want to do and what you don't want to do. What could creating a safe space look like? Now I think about when my kids were little, how much they loved making little tents or hiding in the cabinets or creating something, you know, behind a couch that just was like cozy and comfy. What could your little safe space be? Could it be a couch where your books and your blankets and a perfect little light in a cup of tea is just waiting for you? Could it be that coffee shop that when you go in there, it's almost like you can take a deep breath? What would you like today? Is it some time outside in a quiet space? Whatever it is, what if you created that space? I know I talked a little bit about this, um, during the holiday season, about having one area of your life that when you walk in, you go to that place and it literally allows you to just exhale. We all need that. And then finally, Enneagram Nines, could you find a way to have some alone time, either at home or somewhere else? Enneagram Nines in the Body Center, trying to keep peace. Notice what everyone else needs, sometimes at the expense of yourself. So what if you decided today you're going to schedule in some alone time? What's valuable about giving ourselves time alone is we can do things like journal and start to notice. Wow This is what I'm thinking on repeat It can allow us to conserve some of our energy because it's so natural and easy for those of us who tend to be codependent people pleasers Constantly looking out for the other Um, to give away a lot of our energy. So as I talked about these nine different paths to rest, what are you noticing? Is it easy for you to rest? Is it something that you've worked into your life on such a regular basis that you have practices and tools that support you? Are you feeling uncomfortable at the thought of applying one or two of these tools that I'm sharing? My offer to you is to start with one, whichever one feels the simplest. When I talk about rest, I often use the S word of stillness, silence, singing, strolling, scribing, which means journaling. Just deciding one small little tool that helps your brain to rest. It helps your heart to rest. For many of us, our phones are the opposite of rest. It's constant, isn't it? It's texts and emails and information about things that we really can't do anything about. So what if your decision today is to pause some deep cleansing breaths. And to do whatever it is that you need in order to fill your soul with sunshine, I would love to be your coach and help remind you every single week, how incredibly important you are. What happened in my own life is I went from being overwhelmed, depleted, frustrated and resentful to somebody who lives a vibrant life. And it's never going to be a hundred percent, but for every hard thing in my life, I'm deciding on purpose to bring in two or three or four small practices that support me. So I can be kind and loving and full of peace. And that's what I want for you. So decide a small practice step that allows you to rest. Get it on your schedule, And do whatever you need to do. To be able to rest then play and then do your important work. And look forward to talking again soon. Thank you for joining the Live A Vibrant Life podcast. I hope our time together encourage you and we'll equip you with the tools you need to move into the vibrant life you desire. I'm here to help you live a brave, creative purpose-filled life. And if you'd like to learn more. You can follow me on Instagram or Facebook, Kelly Tibbetts, life coach, or visit my website, kelly tibbetts. com. I look forward to connecting again soon.